Where has my baby gone? I don’t know whether to smile, or burst into tears. Tia-Lee, our gorgeous little girl, celebrated her first birthday last week. She won’t remember it, but I will. To me, it was a celebration of survival. We survived the first year of parenthood, and she survived the first year of our parenting. High fives all around!
It only seems like yesterday that my cousin and I were walking into the hospital to deliver my daughter. Hubby was away at work, so it was a mad rush to organise his flight home. Thankfully, he made it in time so we could welcome her together. Her birth didn’t go as planned, but she made it here safely.
My aunty asked me if parenting was what I expected it to be. In all honesty, it’s easier than what I thought. When you’re pregnant, everyone tells you their horror stories. Sleepless nights, crying fits, mama guilt, the works. Parenthood sounded like a nightmare and I had prepared myself for a devil child! Lucky for us, she wasn’t. Don’t get me wrong, there are moments where I want to pull my hair out and hide in the bathroom, but that only happens once in a blue moon. Yes, parenting is hard, but it’s a different kind of hard.
This past year has taught me so much about myself. I have found a strength I never knew I had. I have learnt to trust myself, be confident and simply own it. I have learnt to live in the moment, and I’m more driven and determined than ever. Tia-Lee has given my life purpose, meaning and direction. I have achieved so much in my life thus far, but that was all for me. My life has evolved into a life that is no longer my own. I no longer think about myself first – my whole world revolves around this gorgeous human. Everything I do now is for her and contributes towards her future. One day I hope she’ll have the drive and courage to follow her own dreams.
We have experienced many milestones together with much more to come. Tia-Lee has grown from a tiny newborn who slept the days away, to a strong, independent, mini me. It is hard to comprehend the change over a year.
As I look back on every memory I’ve created with my girl, I’m filled with so much love. I am thankful to have her in my life. I ask myself, would there be anything that I would do differently? The answer is no. We have the happiest little girl, who is extremely independent, sassy and brave. She is truly my greatest blessing.
To all my fellow mama’s celebrating the first year of parenthood, I applaud you. Whether you breastfed, bottle-fed, crib-slept or co-slept, whatever your parenting style, you should be extremely proud of yourself. High five māmā!